Will I Be Single Forever?

I am somewhat ashamed to admit this - oh well, here goes…I recently asked Google the following question “will I be single forever”? If search engines had personalities or the ability to laugh and mock, I’m certain Google would’ve called his friends over for a beer to make fun of my tragic existence. Fun fact, I’ve been single for two years. Every time I share this sentiment with someone who’s already attached, their advice is “be patient” - really?! Thanks for literally giving me the same advice I can find on Instagram. I guess I initially turned to Google because I’m tired of these cliché responses. What else is a single, attractive woman to do when she’s ready for love but keeps finding nothing but frogs, instead of her Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now.

I want to be in a relationship; a relationship where my vulnerability isn’t seen as weakness. I want someone who reassures me when times are hard and reminds me that they’re here to help me through life’s challenges. I know, it’s kinda sappy and overly romantic but that’s what I want. Sigh! Anyway, instead of ruminating on the thing I can’t control, I’ve decided to focus on how I can enhance my life. So a couple of weeks ago I started working out, making new friendships and yes, I’m still dating. However, my new friendships and working out have been my primary focus. I’ve been lucky enough to meet some amazing friends who have helped distract me from overthinking my dating life. They have helped me realize that this is just one aspect of my life and they remind me that my relationship status doesn’t define me. When I initially typed the title question into my search engine I was focused on the wrong things. I want to return to a time in my life where who I’m boo’d up with isn’t what defines me. When I was a much younger woman, I hung out with friends and focused on my wants and needs instead of losing myself in the person I was dating.

Thanks to this shift in perspective, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed working out. I joined a local gym…super swanky and pricey, very much worth it. I do cardio 2-3 times a week and strength and resistance training 3 times a week, oh and Pilates every Sunday. I started my exercise regimen as distraction but it’s helped me relieve stress and when I added tracking my eating habits, I realized I’ll be well on my way to losing my #pandemicpounds. I exercise every Saturday with one my new friends and have plans to hike with others. I’m still concerned about potentially being single forever but it’s not my primary focus anymore. I’m trying to focus on manifesting the kind of life that I want, taking steps to live a healthier life and surrounding myself with people who push me to improve myself and my life. Will I be single forever? I don’t know. I guess I’ll have to be patient and see how life develops. Ah shit, I guess the people and IG posts that gave me the cliched advice we’re right after all. Damn it! 🙄